Hit Back or Walk Away??

If you’re child is getting bullied what do they do? What do you do?

I am, fortunately, not going through the bullying scenario with my little ones and am dreading it ever happening.

I have had conversations with friends about bullying and their children.
The question is how do you bring your child up to protect themselves against bullies?
There is a clear divide in the answers.
You can tell them to walk away.
Or you can tell them to hit back.
I know there are a few out there who don’t agree with the hitting back and there are people who don’t agree with the walking away.

In my case, my monsters will be told to defend themselves and hit back, as I was brought up. They will be told Never to be the one who throws the first hit, but to hit back if they have been hit.

Myself and my sister were brought up this way, I remember my dad telling me “Don’t be the bully by hitting first. But if you are ever hit, hit back and hit back twice as hard. They will think twice about doing it again”.
I will be telling my children these exact words.

I can understand telling children to walk away and am not completely against it.
What puts me off using that approach is more the schools way of dealing with this. As in my experience at school, seems like forever ago, they just brushed it under the carpet and didn’t seem too fussed by it.
Even now, a friend told me her little boy is getting bullied and when the school were told they wanted to pull her boy out the class and speak with him and not the bullies. To me it should be the bullies taken out, severe words spoken to them and their parents.

How do you feel about this?



  1. Defo learn to hit back. I was bullied numerous times + walked away. I wished I’d hit back + shown I wasn’t to be picked on x

  2. I too would tell my kids to hit back. I don’t want them to be the bully as you say, but I will ‘not’ tolerate bullying and a parent stepping in is not the best option, unless they are first hand witness to it, then I think it is appropriate. They need to sort it out themselves. Having said that, schools need to be more accountable for the bullies themself. I was really bullied at school and no one took any notice until I was in a situation it was almost impossible to get out of. The school ignored it so did the other parents. The only way to stop bullies is to stand up to them, or make them laugh as I did then they stopped it almost immediately.

  3. Having written all of that, I actually think, yes I would say to my kids to hit back, however I would get them to try to stand up to the bully first. Not so that they get beaten up, but just try to mediate it first – Then….. if that didn’t work, yes hit back.

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