What Do I Want To Be??

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What do I want to be??
That’s the question that has been bugging me for what seems like forever and a day!
If honest, it’s really starting to get me down.

Currently, I’m a catering assistant by day (at weekends) and a Pampered Chef consultant some evenings.
Although I enjoy both jobs, I want more.
More of what??? I just don’t know.

I feel silly, that at 27 I don’t know what I want to be. I have many ideas that I could do, but most involve going to college/university.
What’s wrong with that? I hear you say.
Nothing. Absolutely nothing!
I would love to go back to education and learn some new skills.
But I can’t 😦 and my reason for not being able to – I simply can’t afford it.

I was offered a place on SVQ level 2 professional cookery last year at Edinburgh college. I was so excited (as I am a keen cook) but I soon had to put the brakes on that.
All because of Childcare.
For someone to watch the 2 monsters during college hours Monday – Friday would cost me a hearty £462 per week!!
If I went through with that, I wouldn’t be able to pay my mortgage let alone eat.

In my opinion the government should put some money into place so that mums and dads, like myself can go on to further education and get into that career they have always wanted to.
Yet they insist on supplying drugs to drug addicts, and paying people to sit on their backsides.

I will never forget the words uttered to me at my local job centre 2 years ago while I was claiming JSA (I was previously made redundant).
I had questioned the advisor on the fact that I was only getting JSA for 6 months when there are other people less willing to look for a job constantly receiving benefits. Her answer? Quite simply that I had made the mistake of working since I turned 16.
It makes my blood boil!

Anyways, when the monsters go to bed tonight, the ‘puter is going on and Open University/evening classes here I come to peruse your offerings.

Is it normal to have lots of job ideas swimming around your head and not know what one to Brest stroke after??
I feel like I should know what I want to do and just crack on with it.

Do you like the Job you are in?

Do you know what you want to be??
Am I just a silly 27 year old who should know what I want to be??
Answers on a postcard 🙂

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7 comments

  1. I know what you mean. I was there two years ago when my baby boy was born. What I found useful are the percious moments when you are on your own and can realy FOCUS on your thoughts and dreams. It is going to take time, it will be flustrating at times but you will figue it out – and it get easier when “monsters get bigger”. Good luck.

  2. You are certainly not silly, I completely understand how you feel! i’m 31 and still don’t know what I want. I work in admin and completed my nvq level 3 in business admin the day before I went into labour !! I would love to do admin in a school but can’t find the right hours/days/money, I loved working in a supermarket when I was younger but the pay isn’t what I need, I want to be a writer but don’t know where to start or a photographer maybe. Ideally I’d love to be a SAHM but we simply can’t afford that but my ultimate job would be a dolphin trainer, this seems a little unlikely! It’s hard to know what to do for the best, stay where you are because it’s safe or move onto pastures new!

  3. I am 40 and now do what I love but like you would have loved to go and learn more but the cost even for the course was enough to put me off £10,000 for a 12 month cookery course, without child care. It is just out of the reach of most.

    I could not do what I do without the support and encouragement from my husband.

    Keep reaching for your dreams you will get there

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